Week 24: I Can Lose Weight When Pregnant? Damn You, Jenny Craig.

(written by Kate)

Couple of things.

If anyone can get me a Salty Pimp cone
from this place I will love you forever.

1. V-DAY!  Saturday marked the beginning of Week 24 which is considered Viability Day.  Or V-Day (totally different meaning than it used to hold for me).  This means, should the baby be born after this point, her likelihood of living outside of the womb so young increases significantly- of course with a lot of medical assistance.  Obviously we hope she stays in there for many more weeks, but it's a freakin' milestone so we're gonna celebrate it.  Probably with McDonald's soft serve.

Sooooo I can't consider mac & cheese
a vegetable?

2. Weight and Pregnancy.  So, typically, women get totally excited about being pregnant as they can "eat whatever they want" and not care.  As a heavier person this is not the case for me. Now or ever.  In my life.  Ever.  When I first met my OBGYN she challenged me to only gain a pound a month (most women with average BMI are allowed 25-40 pounds for the whole 9 months).




Now since becoming pregnant we haven't changed a whole lot about what we eat- honestly we ate pretty healthy before.  It was mostly cutting out alcohol (*sniff*), deli meats (I pine for you turkey club sandwich) and drinking a lot more water (you taste like nothing- you're just wet).



Despite the fact that I get off the couch about as gracefully as a jet landing on a tarmac covered in petroleum jelly and feel like I should travel by mode of Oompa Loompas rolling me, I've lost 16 pounds since getting pregnant.  WHAT.  THE.  HELL.  I've struggled with weight my entire life doing fad diets, Weight Watchers at the age of 12 and even surgery.  I procreate and I lose weight?!  I even put my gym membership on hold and changed to walking a couple times a week instead...so this is hard to believe! Not that I'm complaining.


3. Cravings. I don't have any weird cravings, but I am definitely more into sweets.  Specifically ice cream.  Mint chocolate chip. I'm trying every flavor out there so if you have a fav holler at me.

When Meg Brings Home a Toblerone

4. Maternity Clothes.  The struggle is real.  I am trying not to spend a lot of money on clothes I can only wear for a few months, but just because I'm losing weight doesn't mean my pre-pregnancy clothes are fitting me.

Let's remember that I've got a big ole bump growing on the front of me- and by the laws of physics: shit don't fit. #science  So putting on a pre-preggers shirt ends up being a battle of tummy exposure over indecent exposure.

5. Baby Talk.  I'm gonna apologize to all of our non-pregnant & childless friends.  Despite our best efforts, we can't help but talk about baby stuff. Chico or Gracco? Not since McDonald's fries v. Wendy's fries has there been a greater debate...  Also pregnancy side effects... nursery decor...the outrageous cost of daycare. We try really hard, but these things will always come up.  We have very awesome friends that politely listen and we totally understand if you're actually replaying the last episode of "House of Cards"  in your mind while smiling and nodding at us.

When you see another pregnant woman,
you have a secret 'hello'.

I am very happy that there is a small posse of pregnant women at my company so we can be baby crazy together.  There are two ladies that just had their babies and three who are due only a couple weeks before me.  And my boss just told me his wife is pregnant due five weeks after me- good luck everyone when we all peace out on maternity leave!


Next up: Nursery "before" shots and "after" plan. (for real this time, I know we promised it last week, but...)

Week 13: Whip Out the Spandex

Well, here we are at week 13.



Kiddo is forming finger prints on his/her fingers, the head is about half of the total length of the kid- size of a peach!- and vocal cords are forming, which we surely will regret when he/she hits about 13 years old.

Some news!  We got the results back from the Early Risk Assessment and our nugget has a 1 in 10,000 chance of developing Downs or other major chromosomal problems.  High fives all around.

We have some check-ups between now and then, but we all know we're counting down until June 19th. Then we can find out the sex and buy all the things.

Ok, so let's remember this is not only a blog for updates on me (#ego) and Meg, but also to drop pregnancy knowledge bombs.  So, in the 13th week there are a couple things you will experience as you start your Second Trimester. #whaddup!

Your nausea will likely subside.  This will be replaced by gastro-intestinal miladies that mimic rush hour on the Mass Pike, after a Red Sox v. Yankees game, with the green line not even functioning at it's normal speed of smell, during a blizzard and then going back in time to when the Big Dig was happening. Here's my advice, friends: pray to whatever deity you believe in and consume all the fiber.  That's all I've got.

When you see a TGIF's commercial
and they show mozzarella sticks.

Your cravings will get stronger.  As your appetite returns (dammit, that was the best diet ever- next to mono. But for reals, I lost 9 pounds in the first trimester) you will want things more than Leo DiCaprio wants an Oscar.  And you'll try, as a rational adult, to make yourself eat super healthy because you are growing a child.  But you know what?  Dairy Queen beats guilt EVERY TIME.  So, yeah, eat that salad (for health and to aid the aforementioned tummy traffic jam), but chase that sucker with a Dilly Bar.  Your thighs will grow with or without it.  I haven't experienced any weird cravings (ie. things I hated before pregnancy, pickles, etc), mine exist solely in the dairy category which is milk which is healthy.  [Meg would like to interject that Kate has indeed been craving-and eating-more hamburgers than ever before.]

What Kate imagines a baby kicking
feels like.

You will start to expand.  And I'm not just talking about gas although you will start burping like a trucker... is that a thing?  You will also start to feel things stretching and growing- no kicking yet, that's around 18-20 weeks.

You will also have some pains every once in a while.  Of course they are typically around the uterus area ... let's remember team, there's a freakin' life form growing in there.  At 13 weeks, the uterus is slightly bigger than a grapefruit so some things have to move and shift to accommodate for the freeloader. Unless it is severe pain with blood, it's pretty much the norm.  Take your finger off the panic button.

Finally, as you grow your pants will start to feel like you just ate a big Thanksgiving dinner.  Now I know most pregnant women aren't my size, but for you fellow plus-sized preggos, Meg did a little research for us on maternity clothes that don't look like they were based on a dare.  Destination Maternity (check out this cute bathing suit that's not in a freakin' floral print!), Target, Kohls  (cute summer work pants that aren't pleated!) & JC Penney's (jeans that aren't stone washed!). That's basically all the options she found, so if you know of others- please leave suggestions in the comments!

Week 12: Guys, There's Really a Baby in There!

So here we are at week 12 y'all!

Sorry for not posting last week, but not a whole lotta new stuff was going down and I ran out of gifs to properly demonstrate my eternal struggle with nausea and my faithful relationship with dairy.  So let's talk week 12!  The most dramatic development this week: Reflexes. The baby's fingers will soon begin to open and close, toes will curl, eye muscles will clench, and the mouth will make sucking movements. In fact, if you prod my abdomen, the baby will squirm in response, although I won't be able to feel it (believe me, the ultrasound tech did it a lot). From crown to rump, the baby-to-be is just over two inches long (the size of a kiwi) and weighs half an ounce.

Today we went to have an early risk assessment test done.  It is a noninvasive test that combines blood work with an ultrasound of the baby to identify risk for specific chromosomal abnormalities, including Down Syndrome Trisomy-21 and Trisomy-18.  Another portion of the test (known as the nuchal translucency) can assist in identifying other significant fetal abnormalities, such as cardiac disorders. #googledit




We were able to see our baby!

On a big screen squirming, waving

and even giving the U-N-I-T-Y fist.

The baby looks good (all the limbs accounted for!), strong heartbeat (164) and both hemispheres of the brain even.  They were able to see a slight view of the nuchal translucency, but our little nugget wouldn't lay quite in the right position to get a clear picture  (thus the nurse pile driving my abdomen with the ultrasound wand) so they want to get a better pic, which means a return visit this Friday.  

Then we wait all the way until June 19th to find out the sex!

Checking your calendar for your next ultrasound

I opened some champagne for Meg and we celebrated our last Cinco de Mayo (Baby-o) sans-kiddo.

Pre-Pregnant Cinco de Mayos

Pregnant Cinco de Mayo

WE'RE HAVING A BABY Y'ALL!

Week 10: Cravings & the Ickies

Week 10 kids.  

Although he/she is the size of a date -- an inch and a half long, from head to bottom -- and weighs less than a quarter of an ounce, the baby now has completed the most critical portion of its development. This is the beginning of the fetal period, a time when the tissues and
organs in the body rapidly grow and mature. If we could take a peek inside the womb, you'd spot minute details, like tiny nails forming on fingers and toes (no more webbing) and peach-fuzz hair beginning to grow on tender skin.

Nausea and exhaustion keep rearing their ugly heads and I'm counting down the days until 2nd trimester when, apparently, we enter the pregnancy promise land- no nausea, more energy, and starting to look as pregnant as I feel.

Meg has been super supportive of me during "icky times", "sleepy times" and "bitchy times"- mostly when she plans a meal and I can't stomach it and then can't tell her what I want.  But I do have cravings.  Cheeseburgers.  Ice cream.  Bananas.  I really miss having caffeine.  And I'm sure I'm going to get weird looks when I get my venti decaf iced coffee... cream, 1 splenda because who really likes the taste of straight coffee anyway?

I started to miss booze recently for the first time- mostly because it's getting warmer outside and all I want to do is sit outside with the biggest glass of white wine in the land.

And someone recently asked me about our birth plan...

I plan on asking for any and all drugs, legal otherwise, and then telling them to squeeze me like a Crest tube.  Bravo to the women who go the natural route and want to "feel" the joy.  You enjoy that.