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Monday, July 28, 2014

Week 24: I Can Lose Weight When Pregnant? Damn You, Jenny Craig.

(written by Kate)

Couple of things.

salty pimp ice cream cone, big gay ice cream shop
If anyone can get me a Salty Pimp cone
from this place I will love you forever.
1. V-DAY!  Saturday marked the beginning of Week 24 which is considered Viability Day.  Or V-Day (totally different meaning than it used to hold for me).  This means, should the baby be born after this point, her likelihood of living outside of the womb so young increases significantly- of course with a lot of medical assistance.  Obviously we hope she stays in there for many more weeks, but it's a freakin' milestone so we're gonna celebrate it.  Probably with McDonald's soft serve.

stephen colbert, daily show
Sooooo I can't consider mac & cheese
a vegetable?

2. Weight and Pregnancy.  So, typically, women get totally excited about being pregnant as they can "eat whatever they want" and not care.  As a heavier person this is not the case for me. Now or ever.  In my life.  Ever.  When I first met my OBGYN she challenged me to only gain a pound a month (most women with average BMI are allowed 25-40 pounds for the whole 9 months).

Now since becoming pregnant we haven't changed a whole lot about what we eat- honestly we ate pretty healthy before.  It was mostly cutting out alcohol (*sniff*), deli meats (I pine for you turkey club sandwich) and drinking a lot more water (you taste like nothing- you're just wet).

Despite the fact that I get off the couch about as gracefully as a jet landing on a tarmac covered in petroleum jelly and feel like I should travel by mode of Oompa Loompas rolling me, I've lost 16 pounds since getting pregnant.  WHAT.  THE.  HELL.  I've struggled with weight my entire life doing fad diets, Weight Watchers at the age of 12 and even surgery.  I procreate and I lose weight?!  I even put my gym membership on hold and changed to walking a couple times a week this is hard to believe! Not that I'm complaining.

3. Cravings. I don't have any weird cravings, but I am definitely more into sweets.  Specifically ice cream.  Mint chocolate chip. I'm trying every flavor out there so if you have a fav holler at me.
When Meg Brings Home a Toblerone

4. Maternity Clothes.  The struggle is real.  I am trying not to spend a lot of money on clothes I can only wear for a few months, but just because I'm losing weight doesn't mean my pre-pregnancy clothes are fitting me.

Let's remember that I've got a big ole bump growing on the front of me- and by the laws of physics: shit don't fit. #science  So putting on a pre-preggers shirt ends up being a battle of tummy exposure over indecent exposure.
broad city, broadcity

house of cards

5. Baby Talk.  I'm gonna apologize to all of our non-pregnant & childless friends.  Despite our best efforts, we can't help but talk about baby stuff. Chico or Gracco? Not since McDonald's fries v. Wendy's fries has there been a greater debate...  Also pregnancy side effects... nursery decor...the outrageous cost of daycare. We try really hard, but these things will always come up.  We have very awesome friends that politely listen and we totally understand if you're actually replaying the last episode of "House of Cards"  in your mind while smiling and nodding at us.

dave chappell, chappell show, comedy central
When you see another pregnant woman,
you have a secret 'hello'.

I am very happy that there is a small posse of pregnant women at my company so we can be baby crazy together.  There are two ladies that just had their babies and three who are due only a couple weeks before me.  And my boss just told me his wife is pregnant due five weeks after me- good luck everyone when we all peace out on maternity leave!

Next up: Nursery "before" shots and "after" plan. (for real this time, I know we promised it last week, but...)


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  2. I enjoyed seeing this post with this cute GIF's especially the that image caption with "When Meg Brings Home Toblerone" :D ..Nice blog.