Weight & Pregnancy, or The Curse of the Junk In the Trunk

So as we have discussed before weight is a factor in a successful pregnancy (duh).  So with me "passing inspection" this is the last hurdle.  Fertility clinics have strict rules about BMI (this was one of the 'rules' clinics have accepting you as a patient) and, despite the fact you can be in pretty great health- weight withstanding, they can decline to inseminate you if you are not at or under the BMI cap.  I have been a "big kid" as a child, a "fat girl" as a teen and "heavy woman" as an adult.  Losing weight hasn't been easy for me and, granted, until I was 20-ish I thought potatoes were considered a vegetable... ...

I have, approx, 40 days to lose 6 pounds to get to the weight my fertility doc said I  would need to be to be approved to do insemination according to the clinic rules.  And it's not just about weight loss.  I also need to maintain my vitamin levels (I've been dissing Vitamin D), keep an eye my thyroid, balance new natural vitamins to help with LH (I read an article that says a natural way of helping increase progesterone/Lutenizing Hormones/lengthening your Luteal Stage (the part where your woman parts prepare for the baby bean drops itself like it's hot).  I'm on a cocktail of vitamins and will start taking Clomid soon.  Sorry everyone for the things I do and say- it is not me speaking, it's a concoction of random chemically induced personalities from a range of Tammy Faye Baker to Chris Brown.

But I've also started working out more.  And by more I mean at all.
I've been doing 45+ minutes a day of cardio for 6 days a week.  I also restricted my diet to no gluten,

no unnatural sugars, no sweets, limited cheese, reduced carbs, and maybe 1 drink a week (if I do it's 1 gin and diet tonic).  Now I know what you're thinking and I already left a message for the good folks at Franzia  so it doesn't throw off their inventory.  Most of the time I feel ok, but I don't look forward to eating.  I see my 134,985th day of salads in a row and there's only so much you can do to make a salad appetizing before it crosses the line into taco salad (just because it has lettuce doesn't make it a salad).  Meg and I were on a walk last night and I legit spent a quarter of a mile talking about fried mozzarella sticks and loaded potato skins like I was performing a live reading of "50 Shades of Gray".

Me Trying to Learn ANY Choreography.

 People at work have been telling me to change things up and join a gym with classes.  Then you can transition into pregnancy workout classes then post-pregnancy workout classes.  I am not good at attending classes.  Group workouts stress me out and I am part of the rhythm-less nation and I inevitably will harm myself/classmate/aerobic equipment with what should have been a Burpee and ended up being a Fartee or a downward facing dog that spirals into sideways falling Kate.  Then there are the people telling me to do Zumba.... have you seen me dance at a wedding?  I come prepared with "I'm sorry I kicked you in the face.  I blame Wine and Cher."

How I Feel When I Leave the Gym.

So, I've got 6 pounds to get to the weight my doctor wants me to be at so the clinic will allow the insemination.  Of course I want to lose more, but eye on the prize kids.

The below has nothing to do with this post, other than further proof I was a butterball of a kid, but I found it while looking at childhood photos.

Foreshadowing?